THANKSGIVING DAY RETHOUGHT:  GRATITUDE RECLAIMED
                                                                                
November 26, 2000

Rev. John P. Gaffney

In the November Odyssey I advertised this sermon in this way:
"Thanksgiving Day Rethought:  What went well? How could we have made it better?" 

This is a Service in which I hope you will share with me your thoughts and your experiences as I will share mine. In this land of plenty, passivity, and consumerism the Thanksgiving Day can slip by and we often feel that an opportunity has been lost. At least this is how so many times I feel upon reflection. It can become a day for overeating, football games, family strife, and gearing up for shopping the next day, the so called "Black Friday." On the other hand, it can be a day of warm family celebration, a true day of gratitude.  How was your day?

Gratitude is the word that captures the soul of this day for me. The
first celebration of Thanksgiving in our Country, as we know, began in a clearing in the
woods on, I am sure, a cold New England Day in 1621. Fifty-six survivors gave thanks for family. Thanksgiving became a national holiday in 1863, during a bitter Civil War.  Abraham Lincoln said we should not "forget the source from which all blessings come." During two of the bleakest moments in our Nation's history, our forefathers and
foremother felt compelled to express their gratitude. Do we feel the same in this time of plenty and prosperity?  

I love the word gratitude from which thanks seems to tumble out spontaneously.
They are almost inseparable. And speaking of gratitude I must say that I
stumbled upon some reflections of the UU minister, Rev. Judith Smith-Valley from whom I will draw upon quite liberally. I was a bit put off when I saw that she was the minister in Kennebunk, Maine, which, perhaps in my ignorance, I see as a land of opulence and overindulgence. Her thoughts, though, are so insightful and so appropriate for our Thanksgiving reflection.

She says that gratitude is a powerful approach for living. It is a force that has the 
 ability to turn everything into a positive, if not joyful experience.

Along that line a Thomas Crum remarked. "Instead of seeing the rug being pulled from under us, we can learn to dance on a shifting carpet." An attitude of gratitude is
thankful for the carpet -- shifting or otherwise.

If we can develop a consciousness of gratitude, negatives lose their power and may even cease to exist. When we "thank" everything in our lives, including the negative, we turn it all into positives. How is this possible? The negatives become positive because they have made us who and what we are. We don't dwell on the dark and draining nature of the negatives but see them as opportunities to become a better, more lovable self. We don't dwell on the negative moment but we focus on the outcome, their potential to fashion the beautiful self we have become.

This is not a new approach. The philosopher, William James, who was born in 1842, observed.  "The greatest discovery of my generation is that human beings can alter
their lives by altering their attitudes of mind."   An "attitude of gratitude" -- What wonderful things it can do for us. It is particularly precious when it is there on
Thanksgiving Day  and its force and presence through the days of our year can burn within and brighten our days.
 
It is so true that it is often impossible to see the good in a situation as it unfolds. Look
back. Remember a job lost, an illness, a love lost. I, like all of you, have had so many
negatives in my life. I've lost jobs, had depressions but looking back each of these and so many others have made me better, stronger, and more sensitive. I don't know where I would be or what I would be without them. Can you reflect upon your own
experiences? In retrospect are you grateful for some of the negatives in your life?
Indeed, they can make you bitter or better.

This brings us to Thanksgiving Day. This is a day of formal ritual for you and me to
bring our gratitude to the top of our consciousness and express it openly.  Our world is
full of so much noise, so many distractions, so little time, so much stress that we must have reminders to pause and summon peace and understanding.

Thanksgiving is far deeper than a simple meal on the fourth Thursday in November. 
It is a "pause in gratefulness for all the processes of life." So many gifts, so many
blessings have come to us through friends, through nature, through a
spirit within. Did you pause in "gratefulness" for them?

Indeed, we can do this every day but Thanksgiving Day is that special day, that
designated day to "pause and summon peace and understanding." Hopefully,
it will spill over to our days throughout the year. We have such power to direct our
lives positively and gratitude is the trigger. Philosopher William James calls this power to
alter our lives by altering our attitudes of mind the "greatest discovery of my generation."
 A Mabel Collins said the same thing. "Each of you", she said "is the absolute law giver,
the dispenser of glory or gloom to you, the decreerer of your life, your reward, your
punishment."  We can be the "law giver,"   “the dispenser of glory" -- what power and with gratitude your potential for growth and happiness are unlimited.

When we become more thankful for the abundance in our lives, the more abundance we will find around us. Isn't that marvelous? Isn't that a power beyond our wildest dreams? The more thankful you are for the abundance in your life, the more abundance you will find around you. It is as though in the looking, you seek and find what is always there -- even when you might not find it initially. Always be thinking: "What might the positive outcome be?"

I have often looked back on the twists and turns in my life--15  years in the monastery, 9 years as a celibate priest in a rigidly conservative Church, a year driving a taxi cab, 9 years selling encyclopedias in southeast Washington and Anacostia, -- and I don't
think I would change a single thing because they have made me what I am. I am what I am because I have played the deck the way the cards were dealt.  It was Voltaire who said: "Each player must accept the cards life deals him or her.  But once they are in hand, he or she alone must decide how to play the cards in order to win the game."

Next Thanksgiving and every other day, I encourage you to continually pause in 
gratefulness for the amazing process of life. And thank you, Judith Smith-Valley, for most of the thoughts above.

Did you pause to be grateful this Thanksgiving? How did you do it? Do you have
certain traditions that you repeat each year? Can you share them with us? What went
wrong and what can you do so it's not repeated? We are a family. Can we
share with one another?