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Rev. Cynthia A. Snavely Sunday, May 20, 2001 There is a saying that, "You may give without loving, but you can’t love without giving." Think about the people and the causes that you care about most deeply, perhaps a spouse, a child, finding a cure for the disease that claimed one of your parents. You may give to the cause of the person calling you on the phone or knocking on your door, but how much more fully do you give when your giving comes out of love? I could change to saying so that it said, "You may receive without loving, but you can’t love without receiving." This too is true. The local store can give me a gift for being their millionth customer and I can receive it, but I could also refuse the gift with no hard feelings. If my child or my lover or my parent gives me a gift, whether it be a physical gift or a gift of their time or attention, I had better think through the consequences before I refuse their gift. There is likely love behind their gift. I may not be able to refuse their gift without their thinking that I am also refusing their love. Love is too broad a word in English. For the purposes of broad human relationships and relationships between humans and other living things I prefer to use the words care and respect. If we care for another and if we respect another we will give and we will receive. To be able to give with care and to be able to receive with respect for the giver is what much of religion is about. "From you I receive, to you I give, together we share, and from this we live." Defining to whom we will give and from whom we will receive is how we limit community. Opening ourselves to give and to receive from all is the quest of our universalism. There is a very famous Christian story that makes the point succinctly, An expert in the religious laws and scripture came to Jesus and asked this question to test him, "What must I do to inherit eternal life?" In other words, what must I do to have achieved full holiness or spirituality? Jesus turned the question back to the questioner and asked "What is written in the scriptures? How do you read it?" The religious expert quoted from the Torah and said, "Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength and with all your mind" and "Love your neighbor as yourself." Jesus said, "That’s right. Do that and you will have attained eternal life or holiness." But the expert wasn’t asking this question to get an answer and so he asked Jesus, "And who is my neighbor?" The story Jesus told is familiar. A man was traveling on a road known to be dangerous when he was attacked, robbed, and left by the side of the road to die. A priest and a Levite, or a minister and a church Board trustee came by and saw the man, but, hey, this wasn’t exactly the kind of neighborhood you wanted to be in for too long and it might have been a trap. They hugged the other side of the road and went by as quickly as possible. Then along came a Samaritan which was to Jesus’ Jewish listeners as a Serb to Muslims, an Israeli to Palestinians, or an Irish Catholic to Irish Protestants. This man stopped. He risked his own life by stopping in the road to dress the wounds of the Jewish traveler. He put him on his own donkey and slowed himself down as he traveled this dangerous stretch of highway. He took him to an inn, asked the innkeeper to care for him until he was well, gave the innkeeper money for the bill and didn’t limit the innkeeper to that amount, but said, "If you spend more, I’ll pay you what I owe you when I return." Jesus asked the religious expert, "Which of these was neighbor to the man who fell into the hands of the robbers?" The expert in the religious law replied, "The one who showed him mercy." Jesus said, "Go, and do likewise." I had a theological school professor who didn’t like the traditional name given to the story I just told. Dr. Dey said he didn’t see why it was called "The Good Samaritan." We don’t know that this guy was "good," he would say. He could have been cursing up a storm the whole time he was helping complaining about this inconvenience. He could have smelled of cheap beer, and never gone to worship services. But perhaps the professor’s point was that what we sometimes define as good isn’t always what is most important. The man saw what was needed and he gave it. Perhaps sometime in his past he had learned this when he had been, not the giver, but the receiver. To be able to give with care and to be able to receive with respect for the giver is what much of religion is about. We are told nothing of the Jewish traveler’s reaction to his discovery as he healed that he had been rescued by a Samaritan. Did he offer thanks or did he spit in the man’s face and tell him he would rather have died than be saved by him? The Samaritan gave with care. We do not know whether or not the traveler received with respect for the giver? Within a congregation giving and receiving is required. We are seeking to create sacred space and religious community. Sometimes we find we are giving what is not needed. But Jim and his committee already did that, we don’t need to make a new policy. Sometimes we find that what we give is ok but someone else could make it better. It sounds good Joe, but I think a soprano solo would sound better we are going to replace you with Linda. Sometimes we try to give so much of ourselves that something else in our lives isn’t given enough. Mom, do you have a meeting again tonight? And sometimes we give and what we give is just what is needed and someone says, "Thank you." The second phrase in the statement of Unitarian Universalist congregations’ purposes and principles is that we affirm and promote, "Justice, equity, and compassion in human relations." Justice and equity are attained when we find a balance in our giving and receiving and the giving and receiving of others. Compassion is giving to those in need whether we or society will ever be able to receive from them. The man who comes into our congregation at age 80 with Alzheimer’s may not be able to give more than his occasional presence, but he is welcome here. The child who comes to our congregation at age three with Down’s Syndrome may not be able to give us more than hugs and smiles. It is enough. Most of us will be able to give to this community. There will be times when we can give more than at others as our families grow, as our jobs change, as our own health waxes or wanes. But if we remember that much of religion is about being able to give with care for the ones to whom we give and being able to receive with respect for those who give to us we will find the sacred space and religious community we seek to create here. Dorothee Soelle said, "If my hands are fully occupied in holding on to something, I can neither give nor receive." Do not hold onto a set idea of what a congregation must be. Do not hold onto a prejudice about a certain person or people? Do not hold onto a belief that does not fit anymore? Let go. Then you will be able to give caringly and receive respectfully. It is in this that you will find spirituality. Back to Sermons
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